Parental Rights Issues That Concern Unmarried Couples

As an unmarried parent, you must take extra legal precautions to protect your rights. Parenting rights that are automatically conferred on married partners don't necessarily apply to you. For example, you may not be allowed to authorize emergency medical treatment for your partner's child. You're not automatically granted custody or visitation rights to your partner's child if the relationship ends. You don't automatically become the legal guardian of your partner's child if your partner dies, no matter how long you've raised the child. If you're an unmarried father, you may not even be recognized as your biological child's legal parent.

Issues for same-sex couples
Many states now allow same-sex couples to share custody of a biological child as long as one of you is the custodial parent. You can also share custody of an adopted child, although most states require one of you to have custody before the other can apply for it. Unfortunately, this prevents you both from adopting at the same time and requires you to go through the costly and lengthy adoption process twice.

Protecting your parental rights
You can protect your parenting rights with key legal documents. These include your child's birth certificate, a paternity statement, a coparenting agreement, a nomination of guardianship clause in a will, and a form authorizing consent to medical treatment for your child authorized by your partner. Bolster these legal documents by discussing your arrangements with the teachers, medical-care workers, recreation leaders, and others in your child's daily life. A living trust may also be referred to as an inter vivos trust or revocable trust.

Using key legal documents to protect your parental rights
Birth certificate and paternity statement
If you and your partner are the unmarried biological parents of a child, you need to ensure that you are both recognized as the legal parents. List both your names on the birth certificate. In addition, you should both sign a paternity statement acknowledging the father's parentage.

Allows you to control your property until you become incapacitated
If you are the original trustee, you continue to handle your own affairs as if you still owned the property in your own name. Authority does not transfer to the successor trustee until it is necessary.

Coparenting agreement
A coparenting agreement identifies the parental rights and responsibilities you and your partner have mutually agreed on. Some areas you may want to address include the following:

• Payment of insurance and medical bills
• Payment of education costs
• Access to school and medical records
• Custody rights if your relationship ends
• Visitation rights to your partner's children if your relationship ends
• Support payments

A family court will disregard custody or visitation provisions if the court determines they are not in the best interests of the child. State law may prohibit you from making binding provisions about child support payments. Although a court may not specifically endorse such agreements, they nonetheless provide evidence of the parties' intent and can be helpful in resolving disputes regarding children when a relationship ends.

Nomination of guardianship clause
As a custodial parent, it's possible that after your death, your child's grandparents could seek custody. If you wish to nominate your partner to become your child's guardian after your death, you can do so by adding a clause to your will. Although your surviving partner may have to establish legal guardianship through the courts, the court will take this clause in your will into consideration as evidence of your wishes.

Consent to medical treatment form
As a custodial parent, you can sign a consent to medical treatment form allowing your partner to authorize emergency medical treatment for your child.

Discuss your joint parenting roles with significant adults in your child's daily life
Notify the significant adults in your child's daily life (teachers, health-care workers, recreation leaders, and others) about these documents. Discuss your joint parenting arrangement with these individuals. Be sure they understand the roles you each play in your child's life.

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